On June 12, a new group of Peace Corps Volunteers will land in Ghana. They will be the first group of teachers to arrive since I came last year.

Their landing is amusing to me because it means there will be about 30 Americans running around who don't have a clue, just like me one year ago. And for about the first month or two I can think about how ridiculous they are, what with their complaining, confusion, silly questions, and whatnot.

"Ha," I will laugh to myself, "You've only been here for 5 weeks or some such insignificant period of time. You know nothing! I am master of Ghana !" But most of them will catch on quickly (the rest will freak out and go home), and I won't be able to laugh at them anymore. Alas, the joke will be over and they will be in the same boat I'm in now.

Recently, someone in this new group posted a comment on this site asking about things to bring to Ghana. I think his name is Dave. Anyway, his post raised the disturbing and amusing possibility that there are other members of this new group reading this site.

Peace Corps sends each new volunteer-to-be information about Ghana. Included in this packet are letters from actual volunteers about life in Ghana . They'll probably never get a letter from someone who is sick with Dengue Fever, had his house broken into, and is feeling lonely and depressed. I suspect Peace Corps' censorship is not the only issue. Volunteers who choose to take their time to write welcome letters for a Peace Corps publication are a self-selecting group, and the sick, lonely crime victim seems less likely to do so. As for me, I just tend to avoid the Peace Corps office (the business pace of Ghana combined with the bureaucracy of Washington, from what I've heard).

But the Internet is powerful! I can communicate with this so-called new group and tell them all the important things they really need to know about Ghana. So here they are:

Things to bring:

• A few books to read during training
• A stuffed animal – it will soon become your best (only) friend
• Shampoo and deodorant (They're hard to find. Soap and toothpaste are not)
• Lots of underwear and socks, although socks are generally optional; I do highly recommend underwear
• At least two bags of Fritos and a bag of textured vegetable protein for me (see your local health food store)
• Two years supply of water (unless you're planning on having diarrhea constantly)
• USB memory thumb pen drive things can be helpful, even if you're not a computer teacher

Clothing: Don't stress too much about this. There's no dress code for school, but you're expected to look presentable. You can always get clothing made here. You won't have money for it when you first arrive, but by the time you start teaching you'll have plenty of money to get a few pairs of pants and shirts. You really only need to bring enough clothing for training. The training dress code is pants and a shirt, preferably with a collar, but I don't think they were too upset with t-shirts (I have no idea what women wear). Also, see the note above about socks and underwear.

Hobbies: We tend to have more time here in Ghana than we did in the US. One person in my group brought an obo thinking that he might learn how to play it (he hasn't). Someone else I know learned a foreign language (not one spoken in Ghana). You may want to consider getting a hobby and bringing whatever gear it requires (note: model trains is a bad choice). As for me, I've started writing short stories. They're about relationships I develop with members of the new group of PC teachers. My stories always end the same: one day my new friends come to visit me and I kill them all in their sleep.

Electronics: I made the mistake of not bringing my iPod. Don't be like me. It would be nice to have a cheap laptop to store pictures and write things like this in my house, but I don't have one. Bring a digital camera and a cell phone that works in Ghana if you can. The cheapest phones here (that work) are about $50. You may be able to buy something online that will work in Ghana for cheaper, and you won't have to spend your precious cedis on a phone. Also, $50 for a used phone in America gets you a far better phone than $50 for a "new" phone here.

LED Headlamp: I've written before about this, so I won't repeat myself. Studies show that volunteers with an LED headlamp are 68% more likely to look silly while wearing a headlamp than volunteers without one.

My non-stick pan: You can't bring MY non-stick pan because it's mine and it's already here. You can buy your own non-stick pan in many parts of Ghana, but I'm still glad I brought mine because it's probably of better quality. And, again, don't ask me for mine because it's mine.

I think that's about all the advice I can offer about what to bring. Enjoy your last two weeks in America. Also, keep in mind that there's usually one person in each group that's doing exactly what you're doing now: moving out of an apartment, quitting a job, selling all worldly possessions, saying good-bye to friends and family, etc. Then this person lands in Ghana, realizes that a horrible, terrible mistake has been made, and is on the next flight back to the US. But I'm sure that won't happen to you…

Addendum #1: I was kidding about the water. It's fine. (As long as you filter it…unless it comes from a river in which case you'll want to do more than just filter it. For example, pretend you're drinking apple cider. That way the brown color won't bother you as much.)

¶ 2:00 PM